"My naked ass is about to touch your handle! It's touching it! In a circular motion. And your handle warmer...is soiled." - Susan

I went to the store today and saw an add for the 25th anniversary edition DVD of "The Last Unicorn". I was both excited and dismayed. Firstly, anyone who has ever discussed the film with me knows of my insistance that it can only be enjoyed by two types of people: small children and adults on drugs. That said, I own it, but am neither a small child nor on drugs. This means other seemingly normal people (like Z-bo) may be drawn into the film for it's emotionally magnetic plot and catchy theme songs by America. This is exciting. On the other hand, the complexity of the plot is going to be lost on the (I predict) countless numbers of young adults/high schoolers who are going to begin debating whose childhood "The Last Unicorn" had a greater impact upon. So that is the dismaying part. But there is yet another silver lining to this 25th anniversary bit: the book will be re-released. It will be shinier. It will be thicker. It will be mine!

According to Wikipedia, the 25th anniversary edition was released last month. I didn't hear anything about it. Did you?

“If you don’t answer every question, ‘Not fly wolf,’ then you have to swallow a sponge.”

I promised to Susan that I would write
Of her quotes from movie trivia night.
This night began like any normal one
But quickly proved it would turn to much fun.

Three of us sat: Molly, Susan, and I
Deciding to give trivia a try.
This trivia was found simply by chance
It was a great find! It made us all dance!

Molly took over – questions she did ask
To answer correctly was a hard task
Susan, however, was not to be beat
She would think and think, while others tapped feet.

Impatience did not break concentration
Wrong answers could mean elimination!
Susan thought hard, Molls made faces at me.
Then, Susan spoke! “I’m gonna go with Heidi.”

Alas, she was wrong! Much to her dismay
‘Never Cry Wolf’ was the answer to say.
She had been so sure -- she’d get it next round.
(The cards were read twice for new ones weren’t found).

In minutes that card was read to us all.
It proved again to be Susan’s downfall.
She looked so distraught, as if she might cry.
But, “Not…fly…wolf?” was Susan’s futile try.

Laughter ensued by everyone present.
One would think that the end of this event.
But Susan went on to entertain us
This time sponge animals were her focus.

One colorful pill she had to swallow
And if successful, payment would follow.
“I’m going to need a big swig,” Susan said
And consumed the pill without any dread.

After small pain and some tightness of chest
Susan proved to have been up to the test.
After contemplation she said to me,
“I’m ninety percent sure it’s a monkey.”

And so we come to the end of our night
If you found it funny, then you are right.
The moral: ‘Not fly wolf?’ the answer be
Or you must swallow pill-shaped safari.

It has recently come to the attention of the contributers to this blog that we have an anonymous devoted fan base. To all of our readers, this post is geared toward your participation, so responses are highly encouraged..

Technological development is continually making activities of everyday life more efficient and less physically demanding. Of recent popular demand: blue tooth. This little ear piece is specially designed for those people whose hands are so consumed with other various motions of importance that they can not hold a phone to their ear. Of course, in our highly-motion-efficient lifestyles, time is wasted in the simple action of moving the phone to the ear, and also in engaging in daily physical activity needed to build enough arm strength to be able to lift the phone. Of course, despite these highly justified reasons for the creation of the blue tooth, it seems that most people who own them do not actually seem to have preoccupied extremities. Instead, it is much more likely to come across a proud blue tooth owner extravagantly waving his hands about in broad gestures while speaking unnaturally loud to whomever is he is on the phone with and glancing about to ensure proper appreciation by passers by of the precious commodity in his ear. However, one may also come across a less expressive blue tooth owner. These people usually seem somewhat awkward and unsure of what to do with their hands, so they usually have them shoved into pockets, or crossed over their chests, yet are still engaged in phone conversation which gives the impression that they are speaking to themselves. So it seems that instead of giving a confident and technologically knowledgeable appearance, blue tooth owners are more likely to appear either completely ridiculous or mentally deranged (except of course for Genny, who most definitely looks like some sort of ultra-important business executive). In all honesty, I can see why the blue tooth was created, if those people who must constantly be on the phone require use of their hands to accomplish other necessary actions..but I feel that it is being sorely abused. So I ask you, dear readers, what is bluetooth to you..futuristic phone-call facilitator, fashion faux pas, or just plain dumb?